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Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Stop the Blame Game 停止指责的游戏吧!



See one thing I want to tell you, don’t judge yourself too much. We have this tendency, we judge our self too much, or we judge others. Either you start blaming yourself, or you blame somebody else. Either you find you are not right, or you find someone else is not okay. You should wake up and stop judging.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. You are part of a phenomenon that is happening. Like there are trees, there are rivers, there are birds; like that you also are here. So many birds are born, so many birds are dying. Isn’t it? So many trees are coming up and they all vanish. Like this, so many people, so many bodies have come and they will all vanish. And then new people will come and they will vanish. This planet has been there for billions of years. See your life from a bigger context then you will stop blaming yourself. The first rule on the spiritual path is to stop blaming yourself, because whom so ever you blame, do you like to be with them? Do you like to be with someone you are unhappy with? No! So, if you blame yourself, you can’t be with yourself.

Spirituality is an appointment with yourself. If you keep blaming yourself, you can never keep an appointment with yourself. So the first law on the spiritual journey or path is to stop blaming yourself. Now, don’t say, ’Oh! That means now I can blame others.’ No! Every time you have blamed somebody, when you see what you blamed them for, from a broader perspective, you will find that it was wrong and it was futile.Now, when you found that your judgments were wrong, then very quickly you can start blaming yourself.So, why I say don’t blame others is because if you blame others, it is going to re-bounce on you. You should not blame anybody.

I have not said one bad word to anybody all these 56 years. The worst that has come out of my mouth is ‘You stupid.’ Sometimes, when I was angry or upset, all that I said is, ’You stupid’, nothing more than this.I have never blamed anyone or never said any bad words. It has not come out of me at all. I didn’t do anything to make it happen; it was naturally like that from the very beginning. I could never abuse anybody; verbal abuse or any other abuse.

When you pay attention to this, when you stop using bad words, your words gain the power to bless. And your blessings will work. Do you see what I am saying?So, stop blaming yourself and stop blaming others. Things are the way they are, just move on and that is it. You know, sometimes people say, ’Oh! This person is a fraud. He is not genuine.’ But one should have some criteria to say, what is genuine and what is fraud. Many times, you don’t even have a criteria to judge somebody, you simply blame somebody, ’Oh! He is a fraud.’ And that’s it, finished.

This is an unconscious tendency that has developed in society to blame others, and to blame oneself and then feel guilty about it. And the spiritual journey is to remove this and reverse it.It is such a delicate thing.That does not mean that you justify all the mistakes you do. When you make some mistake, they you say, ‘Oh I am on the spiritual path, I cannot accept my mistake and I cannot blame myself. So whatever I did is right.’ No!It is such a delicate balance. It is not to justify your mistake but recognize your mistake and at the same time, not blame yourself.
If you don’t accept and recognize your mistakes you will never improve. That’s the end of the story. At the same time, if you recognize your mistake and you feel so guilty, and you keep blaming yourself, then also, it is a hopeless case. So, you need that very delicate balance. Walk on the razor’s edge, neither this side nor that side.
这里有件事是我要告诉你的,停止过分的批判你自己吧!
我们都很有这个潜能,就是我们都很会批判自己,再不然我们就批判别人。不然嘛你就批判自己,再不然嘛你就批判别人。可能你会发现自己是不对的,又或者你发现别人是不好的。你应该清醒过来,然后停止批判了。
不要对自己太苛刻。你只不过是自然现象中的其中之一罢了。就如那里有树木,那里有河流,那里有鸟儿;你也是这样在这里的。很多的鸟儿诞生了,又很多的鸟儿死亡了。对吗?很多树木生长出来了,又有很多的树木消失了。就像这样,很多的人类,很多的身躯来到了,而他们也将会消失的。然后新的人类诞生了然后又消失了。这个星球已经存在着好几十亿年了。从更大的层面去看待你的生命,那你就会停止责怪你自己。走在灵修的第一个首要条件就是:停止责怪你自己,因为当你在指责任何一个人的时候,你还会喜欢和他们在一起吗?如果你对一个人不满意,那么你还会要和他们在一起吗?不会的!那么,如果你责怪你自己,那么你就不能和自己在一起了。
心灵是我们的约定。如果你一直责怪你自己,那你是不能让这个约定圆满的。所以,走在心灵这条道路上,首要条件就是停止责怪你自己。现在不要说“那么我可以责怪别人咯”。不的!每当你在责怪别人的时候,当你只看到你责怪这个人的部分的时候,从更旷阔的视野来看,你会发现这是错误的,也是无用途的。然后当你发现你的判断是错误的时候,很快的你就会马上开始责怪你自己。所以,这就是为什么我说别去责怪任何人,因为如果你去责怪别人,到头来那是会回到你身上的。你不应该去责怪任何人。
我在这56年以来,都没对任何人说过一句很坏的话。从我的嘴里出来的最坏的一句话是“你是笨蛋”。那是有时候,当我很生气或是沮丧的时候,我所说的只是“你是笨蛋”而已,没有别的了。我从来不指责任何人或是说过什么坏的话语。它们从来不曾从我这里出来过。我也不是刻意去那么做的;这是从最初就自然而然发生的。我从来都不会去虐待任何人;言语上或任何的虐待都不会。
当你把注意力放在这里的时候,当你开始停止使用那些不好的话语的时候,你的言语的就会得到祝福的力量。为之,你的祝福也会成真。你明白我所说的吗?所以,停止责怪任何人吧。事情会是像原来的那样,我们跨越过去就好。你知道吗,有时候人们说“噢!这个人是骗子,他不是真实的。”那么说这些话的人是否在依据一些标准来分别什么是骗子,
什么不是真实的。很多时候,我们是没有一定的标准来评判这些人的,我们只是纯粹的去责怪他们:“噢!他是骗子。”就是这样,结束。
责怪别人是我们在社会里建立的潜在能力,
去责怪别人然后再觉得内疚。灵修的旅程就是要去除这些,反转这些。这是件很精巧的事情。但是这些也不意味着叫你去辩解所有的错误。所以当你犯了错误的时候,你就说“噢我现在走在灵修的路上,我不能接受我的错误,然而我也不能责怪我自己。所以我做什么究竟都是对的。”不!这两者之间是需要一个平衡的。我们不需要去辩解我们的错误,但是我们需要去认清自己的错误然后在同一时间也不要责怪自己。
如果你不能接受也不认清自己的错误,你就永远不能改进。这就是故事的结局。同时如果你认清自己的错误,然后你觉得自责,然后你开始指责自己,到最后成为了无可救药的事情。所以取得两者的平衡是很重要的。走在剃刀的中间,不是在这一端,也不是那一(形容中庸,不偏左或右)。

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