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Thursday, April 18, 2013

​​The Perfect Relationship ​完美的感情/關係​

The Perfect Relationship
If you know how to row a boat, you can row any boat. But if you don’t know how to row, changing boats isn’t going to help.
Similarly, changing a relationship does not solve the issue. Sooner or later, you will be in the same situation in any other relationship.

Most people look elsewhere for a perfect relationship, but few look within themselves;at the place from where we relate. What is your relationship with yourself? Who are you to yourself?
People think, ‘Oh, I’m single. I’m so bored being by myself. I need a companion. I need a relationship.’ If you are so bored by your own company, think how much more boring you must be for someone else. And two people bored with themselves getting together, will completely bore each other!
If your relationship is based on personal need it may not last that long. Once the need is fulfilled, on a physical or on an emotional level, the mind will look for something else and go somewhere else. If your relationship is from a level of sharing, then it can last longer.
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When you’re looking for security, love, and comfort from your partner, you become weak. When you are weak, all the negative emotions come up and you become demanding. Demand destroys love. If we just know this one thing, we can save our love from getting rotten.
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​​It’s the limited awareness of yourself and the limited experience of love that encapsulates you in a tiny compartment where you start suffocating. We can’t even handle the love we are asking for because we have never probed into the depth of our own mind; our own consciousness.


完美的感情/關係

如果你知道如何划船,你就可以划任何的船。但是如果你不知道如何划船,換船隻是沒有用的。
同樣的,轉換一段感情是不能解決問題的。很快的你就會發現你在任何一段感情/關係裡都面對同樣的情況。

很多人往別處尋找一段完美的感情,但是很少人往自己的內在去看;那個我們連接的地方。你和你自己的關係是什麼?對你來說你自己是誰?
人們想,噢我單身,我自己一個人覺得很悶。我需要一個伴。我需要一段感情。但是如果你在自己的陪伴下都那麼悶,想一想那麼對別人來說你會是多麼的悶?而如果兩個對自己感覺到悶的人在一起的話,他們會彼此悶壞對方!
如果你的感情是建立在自己的需要上,那麼這段感情可能就不會長久。當那個需要,無論是在物質上或是在情感上被滿足心智會開始往別處去尋找別的東西。如果你的感情建立在分享上那麼它會長久些。

當你想要從你的伴侶身上找到安全感,愛和舒適,你就會變得軟弱。當你軟弱
,所有負面的情緒就會升起而你變得很苛刻。需求破壞如果我們知道了這一點,我們就可以挽救我們的愛讓它不至於腐朽

對自己有限的覺知和對愛有限的經驗讓你自己封閉在一個小小的空間裡然後你開始覺得窒息。我們甚至不能處理我們所要求的愛因為我們從來都沒有探討自己的心智和​​的深度。

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